DEAR ABBY: I had a five-year relationship with a man. We broke up because he was unfaithful. Although I am willing to forgive him and still have feelings for him, my children do not like this man and do not want me to reconnect with him. My children say that if I do it they no longer want to have a relationship with me.

His ultimatum doesn’t seem fair. I’m afraid of never falling in love again and I don’t want to be alone in the future. Should I respect my children’s wishes and give up a relationship with them, or should I seek outside guidance and advice to see if we can try to be a family, as we had originally planned? I really feel like he is the love of my life. Nobody is perfect. I’m willing to give it another chance, but I want my kids to accept it. I don’t know how or if they ever will. What do I have to do? — LEANING TOWARDS IT IN TEXAS

DEAR LEANING: Fear is the absolute WORST reason for a couple to reunite. Your relationship didn’t work out because he’s a cheater. What makes you think this time would be different? There are worse things than being old and alone. There is no guarantee that you won’t meet someone and fall in love.

Your children don’t like this man for a reason. You ask if you should seek outside guidance and advice. I am the first person who has been asked this and I am totally in favor. Your doctor can refer you to someone qualified.

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact our dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or PO Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.